Robin Hood of the busses

My name is Richard Davies and I am a criminal. Today I took a bus ride that First Bus Group Limited values at 4.00 for 0, nothing, zilch. when I boarded the bus I fully intended to pay my way, I got on asked for a ticket presented my 10 note (fresh from the 'cash point' as Barclays bank wants me to call them) at which point the driver scowled at me and clamed he had no change. The fair was 4 he had just got on the bus are you telling me that drivers start their shifts with less than 6 float? So I stood aside waited for others to get on pay and then for him to call me over so I could purchase my ticked. The passengers got on I sat there the driver spent some time fixing the mirror (more about that in a future blog) and then he started the engine and drove off.

Cue a feeling or terror in my stomach, I'm a fair dodger I'm breaking the law, I will be arrested an inspector will come on and ask me to pay the standard fair (20 by a beautiful bureaucratic cock up the signs saying that are right next to the posters telling me that they don't accept 20 notes). So I sit in fear for half an hour craning at every stop of the tell tail day glow halo of a ticket inspector, and then it happens we pass the boundary of Bristol, no ticket inspector has ever been seen this far out I got away with it I got a free ride. but what if the driver still remembers what if he doesn't let me off at my stop what will the blond three rows back think will she regard me as scum or a dangerous man who she would like to get to know?

I gather my belongings (dropping my sleeping bag the bus driver doesn't notice the blond does) ring the bell say thanx in a different voice so as to avoid detection and get off. I did it, I got away, I am a fugitive.